Posted by: smilecoach | September 13, 2007

I’ll Try!

The other day in a coaching call I reminded a client about the importance of the ‘smile exercise’ and the necessity of doing it.  We practiced the one we had just developed and when we were done, I reminded her to do the ‘smile exercise’ 30 times a day for 30 days.  The client, who is enthused about making changes in her life and the direction she is heading, said with a great deal of commitment in her voice, “I’ll try to do the ‘smile exercise’ 30 times a day.”  Those of you who have worked with me, already know what my response was. 


I explained that words have power and the use of the word “try” is a way our ego has of allowing us to slip back into fear-based life patterns whenever we feel like it.  ‘Try’ is a word that opens the gates to mediocrity and living at less than your full potential.  Even though the client responded enthusiastically to doing the smile exercise, the word ‘try’ quickly overrode whatever energy was behind her commitment.  ‘Try’ is an indicator of weak commitment. 


This particular interchange has repeated itself many times over the years in my coaching calls.  When I point that they are saying ‘try’ frequently,  most clients are not conscious how often they use it. ‘Try’ is not the only word or phrase that is used to avoid fully going for something.  Others are:


  • Perhaps.
  • I don’t know.  
  • I will do it if (fill in the blank)
  • Silence – saying nothing
  • But,
  • I can’t.
  • I’ll think about it.
  • I’ll check the kids schedule. 


What is your favorite word or phrase that allows you not to experience your life in all its radiant power?  Are you aware of how often you say it?  Are you aware of what happens to your energy when you say it? 


“I’ll try.” in any of its forms is an indicator of a fear-based life pattern that is operating inside of you.  Fear-based life patterns always prevent us from living our mission and vision.  Fear-based life patterns separate you from the real you.  Fear-based life patterns are learned and they make us feel defective.  We are not defective; we are just living the way we were taught.  The smile exercise can change the way you respond. 

 Words are clues as to what is happening inside of you.  Monitor your choice of words.  Only use words that generate the opportunity to Live On Vibrant Energy.  



  1. There are two aspects or interpretations involved with the word “TRY”. One is fear based, weak and powerless. The other meaning or use of the word is lofty, inspired, intentional and ultimately successful. Try is the motto of the ancient Rosicrucian Fraternity for a good reason. A genuine Rosicrucian embodies what could be called superhuman power because of unwavering faith and effort. A desire to try and achieve what most regard as beyond the ability of mere mortals.
    It involves absolute faith and positivity in the face of what may appear to be overwhelming circumstances.

    To TRY is essentially a refusal to accept defeat or even embrace the notion of something being impossible. It is action, persistence and a powerful determined Will. The willingness to attempt with humility and acknowledgment of our relationship to Omnipotent Authority.

    “I’ll try”, in it’s highest application is the ultimate expression of courage. Is it possible to transform our physical body into pure Light? Most would say no and not bother attempting. But to say I’LL TRY and actually mean it with a powerful commitment – begins the process from mortality to godhood.

  2. Hi Frank,
    I’m paying tribute to the fabulous mentors, coaches and teachers who’ve made a huge difference in how I boldly express my voice to the world. I’d love for you to post my list on your blog, and add to that list, the individuals who’ve made a difference to you. I’ll add your favorites onto mine. You rock you oh so fabulous wise coach you!

  3. i love it the smile made my life joy , i trust frank the way he couch me ,i quit smokimg , i start geting paid for my good work and lots of goodness comes to my life and when i find my self out of joy feeling i remember frank afirmation and do it .. smile its the way God in us want us to share love

  4. Nora you are living proof that the smile exercise works.

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